Surely this is the best “out of office notification” ever?

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I recently visited Cardiff for a few days of work. Cardiff is the capital of Wales and one thing you notice as soon as you enter Wales is that the road signs are written in both English and Welsh.

This reminded me of a production error which was reported a while ago which to me must rank as one of the funniest results of an out of office notification.

If used properly the out of office notification is a great tool as it lets the sender of the message know if you’re away for a while and who to contact in your absence.

The error here though involved Swansea Council in Wales who required a road sign saying:

“No entry for heavy goods vehicles. Residential site only”

They emailed their in-house translation service with a request for a translation of this phrase into Welsh and a reply came back with:

“Nid wyf yn y swyddfa ar hyn o bryd. Anfonwch unrhyw waith i’w gyfieithu”

They then produced the sign with both the English and Welsh text on it and put it in the required place by the side of the road.

It was a while later that some Welsh speakers noticed the road sign and it turned out that instead of telling drivers of heavy goods vehicles that they couldn’t drive down that particular road the Welsh text on the road sign actually said:

“I am not in the office at the moment. Send any work to be translated”

Is this a children’s fairy tale or an adult horror story?

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Forget about the Eurozone crisis that is currently dominating the news and instead, here’s a nice bedtime story to tell your children…

So children, are you feeling tired and ready for your story?

Once upon a time, in a land far far away there was a man called Gordon Reece (or Mr G.Reece).

Now Mr G.Reece was enjoying himself in the sunshine when suddenly everyone in the world started feeling happy and some wealthy friends and banks offered to lend him as much money as he wanted.

Mr G.Reece shielded his eyes from the sun and shook his head in disbelief. He couldn’t believe it but he gladly accepted the loans and with all that money he decided to treat himself.

He bought some houses, cars and a new Sony Playstation.

He even employed a couple of people to help him keep his house and garden tidy.

Things were going well but suddenly people around the world started becoming unhappy and didn’t buy as many things as they used to.

Mr G.Reece suddenly realised he had spent all of the money he had borrowed and didn’t have any money left to pay the interest on the loans.

He had an idea though. He could surely just go to another bank and get a new loan so that he could pay the interest.

Alas for Mr. G.Reece the banks didn’t want to lend him any more money as they knew he couldn’t afford to pay them back.

He then had another idea. To reduce his outgoings he would get rid of one of his employees and pay the other one a lower salary.

His employees were so upset that they messed up his house and garden and told him that they would carry on messing up his house and garden until he reinstated the job and the previous salary.

He then suddenly remembered his wealthy friends that had lent him money (a Mr F.Rance and Mrs G.Ermany). He gave them a call, explained the situation and they kindly agreed to write off some of the debt he owed them and also gave him a bit of cash to help him through the next few weeks.

His interest payments were now lower which was good but he was still struggling to pay the interest and the wages of his employees.

He decided that maybe this time he should actually go and visit his wealthy friends Mr F.Rance and Mrs G.Ermany and persuade them to write off even more of the debt and maybe give him some more money.

He jumped on a plane and headed to see them. He was feeling fairly positive when he arrived to meet his wealthy friends but then his face suddenly dropped.

There, heading to see the wealthy friends were none other than Mr P.Ortugal, Mrs S.Pain and Mr I.Taly. Three of his poorer friends who were also hoping to be given some money.

The problem though is that the wealthy friends don’t have enough money to give to all of the poor friends.

So children, what can they do?

Well, it’s time to go to sleep now kids and the story will be continued another night so sleep well, sweet dreams and don’t have any nightmares…

We’ve got some good news for you. We’ve just found 55 billion euros…

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Sometimes things go missing. You search high and low and if you are lucky enough to find them again then you can be pretty happy.

Germany though has just found something that it didn’t even know was missing.

It’s not as though it’s simply some keys that have dropped down the back of the sofa. No, Germany has just found €55 billion.

This is a pretty significant amount and the “find” came about due to spotting an accounting error.

In October last year, FMS Wertmanagement was created when toxic loans and securities with a face value of nearly €175 billion were transferred to it from HRE bank which was nationalised in 2009.

In other words, a so called “bad bank” was created out of the insolvent parts of HRE bank whereby the bad parts (the toxic debts) of the HRE bank were moved to a separate bank (FMS Wertmanagement).

Moving the toxic debt to the “bad bank” meant that what stayed in the nationalised HRE bank was non toxic and the nationalised HRE bank became solvent. This would in thoery help ensure that HRE bank would make a full recovery.

The German Finance Ministry today announced that there had been a double booking of debt and that staff had inadvertently subtracted funds when they should have added them.

The end result is that the reversal of this accounting error means that German debt, as a percentage of GDP reduces from 83.7% to 81.1% – i.e. debt has fallen by 2.6 percentage points.

So, in summary some good news for the German economy.

I should also mention that if the person that made the initial accounting error is by any chance reading this then we do run a wide variety of training programmes including our introduction to finance range of courses…

It’s just not tennis to leave your phone on at work is it?

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We’ve all been there. Sat in a meeting when suddenly somebody’s mobile phone starts ringing and there’s a mad rush by that person to grab the ringing phone and turn it off.

It’s often the case that the person with the “cheesiest” ring tone is the one that forgets to put their phone on silent.

When the phone rings there’s usually a mumbled apology along with a slightly embarrassed look but then the meeting carries on.

Whilst half the people at the meeting may well be thinking something along the lines of “what an idiot”, the meeting will normally continue with the ring tone soon becoming a distant memory.

There are certain jobs though where it really isn’t advisable to take your phone with you to work. For example, I’m not sure that a surgeon or classical musician should really have their phone with them when they’re working.

The video below shoes an interesting situation when top tennis player Caroline Wozniacki is about to serve against her opponent, the French tennis player Alize Kornet.

As a professional tennis player you need to remain focussed and concentrated at all times. Miss Wozniacki’s concentration though is broken by the ring tone of a phone belonging to none other than her opponent…

Would you look at this advert or not?

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Those marketing guys can be a creative bunch and the 2012 Olympics will be a great opportunity for them to show off their skills.

The Olympic organisers though are worried that some people may show off more than just their skills.

Ambush or guerrilla marketing is where companies which are not official sponsors of events such as the Olympics try to get their advertising message across without paying any sponsorship money to the organisers.

We’ve blogged elsewhere about Hugo Boss and Bavaria beer’s attempts at ambush marketing so what are the Olympic organisers worried may happen next year?

The London Olympic Games and Paralympic Games Act 2006 (the UK law in connection with the Olympic Games) is being changed to try to prevent people from using their bodies as mobile advertising boards.

At the last Olympic Games in Athens a man invaded one of the diving events with a brand name written across his bare chest.

Olympic organisers are worried that ambush marketing may go one step further and people may “streak” naked at an event with advertising slogans written across their bodies.

Whilst a naked spectator running across an Olympic event will no doubt get the press cameras clicking it’s not something that the Olympic authorities and the official sponsors would appreciate.

The change to the legislation could result in a person that undertakes guerrilla advertising at the Olympics by using advertising on his or her body being fined £20,000.

My personal view though is that this is nothing for the organisers to worry about. Given how cold the British summers are I doubt there will be many people willing to take their clothes off at the London Olympics and run as a mobile advertising board…

Goodbye to a visionary and creative genius.

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Born to an unmarried interracial couple, adopted at a young age, dropped out of college and fired from him first major job. Steve Jobs went on to build two billion dollar businesses.

Unfortunately, the iconic face behind Apple lost his battle with pancreatic cancer on Wednesday and the world lost one of the true business greats.

In terms of his impact on business as well as people’s everyday lives, his legacy will be right up there with the likes of other great visionaries who introduced “life changing technology” such as Henry Ford and the mass motor car.

Steve Jobs taught the world many things and whilst there have been, and no doubt will be, lots written on his business methodologies one particular approach of his stands out as far as I’m concerned.

His creations really encase the concept of providing great products but importantly offering real “value” for these great products.

By “value” I don’t mean that they are the cheapest. In fact, they are far from the cheapest but what Apple do provide are excellent products which customers will pay a premium for as they perceive that this additional value the products offer is worth paying for. In classic Michael Porter terminology this could be referred to as “differentiation”.

Steve Jobs had an uncanny ability to spot the next great thing that customers would want and then to develop a product which although relatively expensive would create such “value” that customers would purchase it instead of cheaper options.

If Apple had competed purely on price then there would always be another company which would come along and offer a similar product for a lower price.

As well as the innovative Apple products that have hit our shelves, Steve Jobs will also be associated with the black St. Croix Collection turtleneck sweater that he would wear at product launches.

Since his death there has been a run on people wanting to buy these sweaters and the company that manufactures them, US based Knitcraft Corp has reported a surge in orders in the last 24 hours. Despite a total order run of between 4,000 to 5,000 sweaters many St Croix stores have now run out of stock.

Rest in Peace, Steve Jobs.

Can I have a skinny latte, a blueberry muffin and a corporate loan please?

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One of the real challenges facing a lot of companies at the moment is access to funds.

The economic turmoil over recent years has led to the loan markets largely drying up and without access to suitable cash reserves a number of firms have hit cashflow problems and have gone out of business.

Similarly, a lot of businesses that have wanted to start up in the recession haven’t had access to loan funds to enable them to do so.

The end result is that jobs have been lost.

The global coffee chain Starbucks though think that they may have an answer to some of the funding problems.

They have just launched a campaign to try to stimulate job growth in America by launching a “Create Jobs for the USA” initiative.

They are partnering in this initiative with Opportunity Finance Network (OFN), a group of private financial institutions that provide affordable loans to certain parts of the American population including low-income people and communities.

As well as donating $5 million to get the project off the ground Starbucks are also covering the admin expenses of OFN as well as paying for the manufacture of wristbands which will be given to any of their customers who donate $5 in one of their coffee shops.

Starbucks Chairman and CEO Howard Schultz said “Small businesses are…employing more than half of all private sector workers – but this critical jobs engine has stalled. We’ve got to thaw the channels of credit so that community businesses can start hiring again.”

100% of the donations made will go to OFN to help fund loans to community businesses including small businesses, microenterprises and nonprofit organizations.

Starbucks themselves though have also been a victim of the recession with several hundred stores being closed in the US alone in recent years and some sceptics may argue that this is just a PR initiate by them.

My personal view though is that if this initiative helps to create jobs then it can only be a good thing.

Who earns the most out of a PwC or Deloitte partner and who’s suing Deloitte for $7.6bn?

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The Financial Times or FT as it is generally known, is a great newspaper.

First printed way back in 1888 by James Sheridan and Horatio Bottomley, the FT specialises in business and financial news.

You can find a lot of information in the FT.

Information ranging from share prices to the latest business activities can all be found within the paper’s famous light salmon coloured covers.

They have also recently highlighted some interesting figures about the average partner remuneration in the UK firms of PwC and Deloitte.

In the year to 30 June 2011 the average profit share for each PwC partner in the UK was a healthy £763,000.

In the previous year to 30 June 2010, Ian Powell, the Chairman of PwC, received £3.6 million. The latest figures show that he managed to increase this amount to £3.7 million in the year ended 30 June 2011.

But what about PwC’s fellow Big 4 partners from Deloitte?

Even though the Deloitte figures are not entirely comparable with PwC’s due to differences in the treatment of past pension obligations, the results are interesting and it’s not all good news for Deloitte partners in the UK.

This year saw their average profit share fall by 13%. They now have to scrape by with £758,000 per year compared to the £873,000 that they had the year before.

Whilst figures are available for the UK Deloitte partners they are not currently available for the Deloitte partners from over in the US.

My guess though is that the US Deloitte partner’s profit shares may well be reduced this year though as money may be held back for potential legal fees after it was announced today that Deloitte in the US are being sued for the princely sum of $7.6 billion.

They are accused of failing to detect fraud during their audits of a US mortgage firm which went out of business during the US housing crash.

A Deloitte spokesman was quoted in the press as saying the court claims were “utterly without merit”.

So, how well are Nike doing?

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You probably haven’t heard of the lady by her name but you have without a doubt seen her most famous piece of work.

40 years ago Carolyn Davidson was paid the princely sum of $35 for the design of a logo.

That logo was the Nike Swoosh and it has gone on to become one of the most famous logos in history.

Nike has just released their latest set of financial results and for the 3 months to 31 August 2011 they made an impressive net profit of $645 million. Despite a global recession Nike has increased profits by a healthy 15% on the same quarter last year.

Their revenues showed an even more impressive increase, rising 18% to a quarterly figure of $6.1 billion.

The fact that sales increased by 18% but profit only increased by 15% indicates that costs increased and Nike stated that costs had increased due to higher raw material prices.

Nike is the world’s largest sports shoe and clothing maker and the latest set of results emphasised its global business. Sales improved in nearly all the markets that they operate in. There were especially strong gains in the US, India and China.

North America is Nike’s biggest market with sales rising 16% to $2.2 billion but the emerging markets are quickly catching up with revenue from this area rising 35% to nearly $800 million.

So, what will the results look like for the corresponding quarter next year?

Well, with the 2012 Olympics taking place my guess is that the results for Nike will look pretty sporting.

What would you do if your credit card balance was this big?

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Sometimes it’s difficult to get a feel for economics and the concepts and amounts involved.

A friend sent me an email that’s doing the rounds on the internet and it emphasises rather nicely the issues behind the financial problems that the US currently faces.

It moves away from “grown up economic terms” to instead use an example about the US financial problems which people will find easy to understand.

They may also however find it a bit shocking.

The US financial position can be succinctly stated as:

1.    US Tax revenue: $2,170,000,000,000
2.    Fed budget: $3,820,000,000,000
3.    New debt: $1,650,000,000,000
4.    National debt: $14,271,000,000,000
5.    Recent budget cuts: $38,500,000,000

Now, if you simply remove 8 zeros and imagine it is a household budget you’ll get the following:

1.    Annual family income: $21,700
2.    Money the family spent: $38,200
3.    New debt on credit card: $16,500
4.    Outstanding balance on the credit card: $142,710
5.    Total budget cuts: $385

There. It’s easy. Who said economics was difficult?

Now, how do we go about extending the credit card limit again?